Last Updated on November 17, 2023 by The Smetz Files
I’m not much for new year resolutions or depriving myself of something to achieve a better version of myself. I do believe in establishing healthy habits, doing things in moderation, and setting reasonable goals (though I won’t deny myself a cup of coffee each morning!). At the turn of the year my boss emailed our team with essentially that message; set goals, work towards those, but keep in mind we’re human. I liken this to the idea that progress over perfection is more important than perfectly achieving those goals.
I’ve thought a lot about this notion of progress over perfection in recent weeks. Jay and I have been intentional about moving more, both for our physical and mental health; we have held each other accountable for disconnecting and being more present, both with each other and with the kids (you know while they still want us around, because I feel like we’re on borrowed time with that!). Some days are better than others, but nevertheless, we’re making strides and that feels good. Progress over perfection.
The Power of ‘No’
Reflecting on some recent personal stresses, one area in which I would like to make some progress is the act of simplification, simply saying, ‘no’. I find this hard to do, especially when it comes to supporting the kids in their endeavors or volunteering at church and in our community. To some extent, we’re all guilty of it. Years ago I read a quote on Pinterest, ‘Stop the glorification of busy’ it read. WOW! Great advice. But, HOW do we do that?!
Again, for me it goes back to progress over perfection. Some seasons of life I’m better at saying, ‘no, thank you, I can’t commit to that right now’ while others feel like I’m shot out of a canon at the beginning of each week, only to collapse briefly at the end of the week, and geared up to start it all over again the following week. Truly, it’s unsustainable, but how often do we fall victim to the glorification of being busy?
Sometimes as I scroll social media or listen to other parents while we wait for kids’ practice or events to wrap, I’m in awe of all they do, personally, professionally, civically, and with their kids. I wonder, how do they do it ALL? Do they require less sleep than I (entirely possible, because if hibernation were an option, I’d be all for that!)? Do they have more hours in the day? What secret do they know that makes them more productive, and why has no one shared such successful tidbits with me?! Trust me, I understand social media is a snapshot, a moment in time of the carefully curated pieces we want to project. But, I do think it’s this constant state of comparison that harkens the idea that busy is better, productivity is preferred. Thus, one of the habits I’m endeavoring to establish is simplification.
Simplification
One way I am simplifying is consuming less social media. Ironic, isn’t it, that I’m reducing social media consumption while researching how to blog, curating ideas for content creation, and exploring bloggers writing styles?! I found scrolling had become a way to distract me from whatever was in front of me: a lull in the action at a game, a short break between meetings without time to really delve into the next project, or rewatching an episode of a favorite TV show for the umpteenth time with no desire to search for something new to watch. Some days are better than others…again, progress over perfection reigns.
Female sitting, overlooking the land
Here are the habits I committed to work on this year:
- Reduce mindless scrolling and social media consumption
- Simplify our schedule
- Focus on progress and process over perfection
What are the habits you are most urgently pursuing?
Thanks for reading The Smetz Files! To read other simple musings of a small time mom, see my previously posted content. Let’s connect!
