Quality Time: Three Ideas for ‘Dates’ With your Kids

Sharing is caring!

Last Updated on November 14, 2023 by The Smetz Files

Do you find quality time hard to come by, especially with your kids? Recently we indulged in that single child feeling with S (G was on an overnight school trip). It got me thinking about what a treat it was to spend time with her individually and be fully present with her. 

Our kiddos are close in age and for the most part they are always together. They attend the same school. They are in the same youth group at church. They have friends that overlap. They cheer each other on at games and know each other’s teammates and families. 

But they are different individuals and it’s fun to spend time with them 1:1. Since S was feeling that single child mojo, she asked to go out to dinner at a restaurant of her choice while G was away. It’s kind of like going on a date with your kid. It was a nice night to make time and prioritize her interests.

So, if you find 1:1 time elusive with your kiddos, here are three ways you can ‘date’ your child and spend time with them as individuals. 

Get Outside

This one is easy since our kids love being outside. At home or at the beach, they love to play in the yard, go for a swim, or bike ride. When we get precious 1:1 time, I ask them what they want to do together. Frequently my kids will respond, go for a walk, play catch, or shoot hoops. I relish the opportunity to get out with them, listen to their uninhibited thoughts and hear what’s weighing on their minds. I like getting outside and doing an activity of their choice, because these are largely free, they can be spontaneous, and it’s just fun to connect.

Indulge a Treat

I may or may not have created a bit of a monster with this one! Invariably, if I have one kid solo they ask to get a treat. We go between grabbing a milkshake or driving through Starbucks (this one is a treat for me, too!).  We make it an event by toasting with our treats. Ironically, even when they are on their own, they always ask to pick a treat to take home to their sibling, it’s kind of heartwarming. My dad contributes to this one, too because he takes them to the concession stand at their games!

Run Errands

So, this one may be a weird ‘date’ idea, but often when I have the kids individually and ask them to run an errand with me, they love to help. Silly things like running to pick up groceries, dropping something off at church, or checking on a neighbor are more fun when you can hang out with the kids. 

Regardless of what you decide to do with your kids individually, it’s all about the point of connection. I enjoy the spontaneity of unplanned dates.  Individual time is rare for us and I always enjoy hearing what’s on their minds, finding things humorous together, and involving them in what I’m doing. I have a sneaking suspicion as we approach the pre-teen years I won’t be their first source of hanging out. But, I hope in cultivating strong relationships with them now, I’ll always be a safe place when they’re ready. 

What are some fun things you do when you find you have individual time with your kids?

If you enjoyed this post, read about our mother/son winter weekend at the beach!