Last Updated on July 16, 2025 by The Smetz Files
How investing in our family led us to the sea
In my Five Year Plan , I shared our goals and how Jay’s stroke forced us to reevaluate our dream house. At the time that felt defeating and disappointing, ultimately it created future opportunities we hadn’t fully considered or explored.
After Jay’s stroke in 2015, we downsized and purchased a fixer upper. Truly, it was close to condemnable.
Changes
Simultaneously, I resigned from my job and returned to graduate school full time to pursue my PhD.
That’s a lot of change in a short time.
Did I mention our kids were one and three years old at the time?!
I’m confident my mother thought we were insane! She muttered, ‘I’m glad you can see the potential, because I sure don’t’ as she wandered around our recently purchased fixer upper with peeling wallpaper, light fixtures dangling dangerously low (Jay had to duck to enter the kitchen without getting a head injury!), and the stale scent of cigarette smoke lingering from the prior owner.
Next Steps
Part of Jay’s post-stroke recovery had been naming how relaxed he felt at the beach. It was a place of respite for him. A place for him to disconnect and recenter. We spent some time with my parents at Oak Island, NC in a small cottage on the beach. He loved the tranquility of a quaint beach town. Having not grown up visiting NC beaches, we decided to visit several in our quest to buy a home on the coast.
By 2018 we had an updated five year plan! One that included trying to act sooner, rather than later on purchasing a beach house. So, that’s what we did!
Taking Action
In 2018 and 2019 we visited several beach towns in North Carolina. Our only real priority was proximity to home. We hoped to be within three and half hours of the triad to make weekend trips feasible. The visits, some of which were day trips, others we spent a few nights, were mostly for vibe checks.
How did it feel? Was it family friendly? Were there local shops, restaurants, and entertainment attractions without feeling too touristy? Was it somewhere we could see ourselves bringing our friends and family for generations to come? Would it be a place of respite for us, but still provide amenities without feeling secluded?
The Right Spot
By the fall of 2019 we decided Ocean Isle Beach was our desired location. Earlier that summer, we made the drive to Ocean Isle from nearby Oak Island (we were spending a few days there with my parents and brother). As we drove up on the traffic circle to enter Ocean Isle, the row of shops to our right were reminiscent of the architectural style in Cape Cod, MA, where Jay played two seasons of summer ball in college and we spent time with his family. We instantly loved the vibe.
Love at First Sight
The day we visited was turn day (a Saturday where one group of renters leave in the morning and another group arrive that afternoon) in the height of summer, so there was a general hum of activity; cleaners, linen providers, pool cleaners, and AC contractors moving about the island preparing for the next round of renters and guests. As we crossed the bridge onto the island we opted to turn East where there seemed to be a lot of homes. We drove casually up and down the streets, along the waterfront and made our way up and down the canals before heading West.
About half a mile west of town center we turned into a small neighborhood set back from First Street. There were several charming homes on the circular street, perfect for bike riding, tucked away from the hustle and bustle of the main road.
We were enamored. I remember making the last turn before exiting the neighborhood and continuing our exploration that I wished we could have a house on that street.
Patience
As summer transitioned to fall we kept an eye on the market via several search engines and dreamed and awed over several homes as they came up for sale and quickly sold. I had no grand delusions about actually buying one, I assumed we were years away, as we were fervently saving for college tuition and funding our retirement. But still it was fun to peruse and examine home styles and dream of how I might decorate our future beach home.
Apparently Jay was also keeping a pulse on the real estate market in Ocean Isle because he showed me a house online in January (2020) that was seemingly perfect. It was in the exact neighborhood I had secretly been scoping and we loved so much from our visit!
Of course, to temper my excitement, he said, it’ll probably be sold by the time we get to buy…talk about a dream dashed in an instant! I guess the dream stayed alive in Jay’s mind and we talked more seriously about numbers he crunched and options we could consider to make it a reality.
Expect the Unexpected
By March of 2020 we had a plan in place, worked out the financing, and BAM – COVID. The island was shut down, no visitors allowed, public beaches were closed, and essentially the whole world came to a grinding halt (you likely remember this!).
Surely it was insane to buy a house sight unseen! Though we learned many buyers purchased real estate through video technology without ever seeing the homes in person. To add insult to injury THE dream house was under contract, with no hope of us seeing it. Ugh!
The Impossible Dream?
Never ones to give up or cower in the face of a challenge, we found other options on the island. We worked with a friend from college who was a real estate agent and knew the coastal market well. Brunswick County (where Ocean Isle Beach is located) reopened to visitors on April 22nd. We called our friend to set up showings and agreed to meet him at 9:00 am to see six houses, one of which was our dream house, that was back on the market after falling out of escrow…what luck!
We saw the properties, met with Jeff briefly in an empty parking lot to discuss potential strategy and drove the three hours back home. By the time we hit the driveway we had decided to proceed with writing an offer on THE dream house.
Photo of OIB Pier courtesy of OIB.gov
After weeks of tense negotiations, inordinate online shopping (our garage became a de facto storage facility for all new beach furnishings, the FedEx driver became my new best friend!), and planning we rented a moving truck and caravanned down to Ocean Isle one early morning.
That day we closed on THE dream house, lovingly named Diamond by the Sea to pay homage to our love of all things baseball.
Buying and selling real estate and moving are insanely stressful life events. Even amidst our excitement, we were anxious. There were most definitely moments of sheer frustration.
We are so grateful to have our Diamond as a place of respite to build family memories for years to come. What’s a dream you have worked relentlessly for? Sound off in the comments!
Read more of our Beach Bum adventures!
